I wish somebody told me this when I first started my coaching business.
At the same time though, everything in life is practice. Everything has a learning curve. The more you do something the easier it gets. I’m grateful for all of the times doors have been closed on my face (literally) for how it's taught me to live more heart-centered, learn to speak to people in ways that resonate with them - human-to-human.
I feel like there’s an innocence to trying things out for the first time. There's something really fun and playful about throwing yourself into a new environment and seeing how you fare.
Sure, you’ll fall flat on your face a few times, maybe a few hundred, but whatever meaning you make of that is up to you. You can get hard on yourself and tell yourself it's because you're no good, or you can just see it as a learning experience.
I had a guitar once. When I first picked it up I thought, “this is so much harder than it looks.” And it’s true. Good guitar players make it look easy, don’t you find?
I had an idea of one day being a skilled guitar player. But through that experience of course I was quickly humbled. That humbling didn't shatter my dream of being an amazing guitar player, though. Instead, it brought me to a point where I started to play the guitar just for the sake of playing it - not to become someone one day.
Every so often I would pick up that guitar and just fiddle with it. I had no agenda to accomplish anything. And guess what? Several years later, I’m half-decent at it. I don’t remember the moment I was able to play half-decently. To me, the whole thing was just fiddling. And to this day I continue to fiddle.
Right now, my favorite instrument to fiddle with is the heartstrings. The heartstrings of the people whose lives are on the cusp of a beautiful transformation, that is.
Words are amazing. Words convey ideas, and ideas evoke feelings. To play the heartstrings is to be able to use the words that convey a meaning that makes people feel alive, hopeful, inspired, and open to possibility.
There’s such a beautiful feeling when you land the right note. Whether it's the perfect chord on a guitar or a heart cracked wide open to possibility.
Honestly, sometimes I feel on the verge of tears when I get just the right sentence. Just that exact sentence that resonates with one particular person at one particular moment.
Another beautiful thing about playing the heartstrings is that you get instant feedback on how good it is by how you feel. Rather than following a prescription or a formula, and using sales or profits to gauge effectiveness, you’ve got your own heart to let you know when you really hit home. And your own heart can crack open too when the words are just right!
Here’s a fun little exercise if you'd like to practice: imagine the human being whose life you want to change. Mentally become that person. Step into their reality. See life through their eyes.
Can you create a string of words that convey such a strong feeling of hope and possibility - just exactly right for that person - that you can make yourself cry?
That’s your homework.